Time

"Why did we become like this? Why are we so estranged now? Why aren't we like how we used to be?"

She thought to herself.

But then it hit her. Time.

Time. They say time heals broken hearts. Everything will go better with time. Just give some time.

But time also changes people.

And for a relationship that wasn't too strong, time can damage that too.

It was only last year, not last decade. Last year. Only a couple of months past and they act like the only thing in common between them is the classroom they shared.

Thinking back to the time of glory of their relationship, she missed it. So so much. The way they always talk to each other. The way they spent times together; morning, afternoon, evening, night. The way they chatted till the first ray of sunlight hit through their windows. She missed it all.

And she used to think that he liked her. He used to act as if he liked her. That he was willing to listen to all her ramblings. Throw her rubbish for her. Go out with her, for dinner, tea or lunch. Go out with her, because she wants to do some shopping. Chatted with her, because she doesn't feel like studying. And the way that he doesn't talk to other people in class. The way he always say hi to her first in the morning. Doesn't that mean he liked her? 

But time changes people.

Time changes him.

He doesn't text her first. He doesn't say hi to her first. In fact, they won't talk if it's not she had to tell something. No, he doesn't play around anymore. He is more serious. And less fun.

But maybe, just maybe, time changes her too?

Maybe she has no more story to tell him. Maybe she can throw her own rubbish. Maybe she always cook at home that there is just no reason to eat out. Maybe she has a new group of friends to go shopping with. Maybe, just maybe, she doesn't need him anymore.

And maybe, just maybe, time changes their feelings.

Or maybe, just maybe, she wished that she can stop the time where what matters is that they are together.

life update

hello blog.
dah berapa tahun tak update blog eh?
takpe. bukan ada orang baca pon HAHA
btw meh nak buat a lil life update.

eh actually takde lah lama sangat.
raya haritu dah update. hehe.

waktu cuti haritu pergi hk.
it was okay, nothing really amazing.
except the fireworks at disneyland.
that was AWESOME AND MAGICAL.
i hate the fact that everything was expensive.
siapa yang cakap pergi hk best shopping penipu besar! huh

now i'm back at manipal for my 2nd year, and hopefully final year here.
i had to give a lil speech to junior that day
kan dapat 4d. lol
i was a lil bit disappointed with myself because i didnt say all i wanna say
i guess i was nervous and i just want to get over with it.
and i ended up embarrassing myself.
nasib baik tak ramai datang haha.

i took part in the juniors orientation.
becoming a station master during the evening activity,
and performing dikir barat and flashmob during the dinner.
and yelling and laughing so loud that i lost my voice.
but it was good fun.

then the raya haji.
it was nice because we had two open house.
on the day itself, we had an open house for our classmates.
oh by we, i mean all the bds4 muslims.
my housemates and i masak roti jala.
we did that until 2 pagi.
nasib baik jadi and it was actually quite a hit. yeye
the 2nd open house we had few days after raya haji,
we cook nasi kerabu with daging bakar!
THAT WAS TOTALLY COMPLETELY A HIT!


















then did i tell you i'm now living in an apartment?
i have my own room again.
bayar mahal sket lah. and agak jauh.
but nevermind. ada hikmah dia tu
i'll show you the pictures.


living in your own house has its pros and cons.
the most important cons is you tend to get comfy and forgot that you're here to study,
that's what happened to me.
first block nie memang hancus.
tiap2 malam tengok movie. main2. tak study langsung
even nak test pon study bodoh2 je.
but on the bright side,i get to practice cooking.
and buying groceries,paying bills and all things grown ups do.
feel really matured.
feel like a 21 years old lady.
feel like a housewife. opps.





did i tell you i was thrown into batch b?
me and adl.
at first it was kinda suck because i'm used to being in batch a with all those people.
and because i got separated with that someone.
but later on i found out i rather be in batch b
than being in batch a and watch with envy.
i had MORE fun in batch b.
of course i got a little renggang with him,
tapi i dont think being in batch a will change anything.
people will still gossip him and her.
and gua makan hati.
so it is waaaayyy better to be in batch b and be ignorant of all that.
ignorance is bliss what.

so talking about the devil.
this year it was really awkward and weird and not at all like what we used to be
don't know what went wrong.
like he said, the chemistry wasn't there anymore,
i don't know what to talk about,
and he kept on keeping secrets.
not that i SHOULD know his secrets,
but i kinda terasa when he always says "ada hal"
like what hal sampai tak boleh cerita?
i did throw a small tantrum once.
and he did try to tell me what he 'hal'
but it didnt feel right you know?
like he's telling me not because he wanted to, but because he needed to.
so now i dont really tell him much
and he never tell me anything
anyway we dont spend much time together anymore.
we only have 1 hour theory class, and him coming late doesnt give us any time to catch up.

i remember we used to whatsapp all night long
and he once said, even if we are separated, 'whatsapp aku sentiasa terbuka utk kau'
kepala hotak dia. haha
even if i msg him, his replies wasnt earnest.
so i dont feel like talking to him.
so i didnt msg him.
and he never cares. wuwuwu sedih nya
HAHA

not being too close to him, i think i dont like him that much
i know i already said this,
but this time it's for real (kot)
because you see, i liked him because he was there for me.
now that he's not there anymore,why should i like him?
and he doesnt even like me in the first place HAHA

anyway, i read an article about ikhtilat.
and waktu tu pergh sentap habis!
because i was/still am like that
and that's why i tried to put some distance. like he didnt put already
i wanna be a good muslimah.

maybe actually this is all a sign that he wasnt THE one.
we're growing apart.
and we cant do nothing about that.
so let it be it.

by the way. apa panjang sangat cerita pasal mamat nie?
ish.
nak buat lil life update konon. cakap je lah nak berjiwang lol

oh nak cerita haritu pergi bangalore shopping.
habis duit.
so habis cerita. haha.

cuti feb nie papa and mommy datang.
i thought taknak balik lah kan.
dah bulan 8 nak balik for good (insyaAllah)
tapi sorang pon tak stay (not including the non-muslims and the boys)
so takkan aku nak melangu sorang2 10 hari lagi.
so aku bodek boss dan mungkin dah ada green light nak balik.
hik3.

anyway, i should be studying for the upcoming end block.
5 days more and i only baca 1 portion of microb.
3 subjek lagi ke laut ke?
taknak taknak. dr arun suruh dapat 4d lagi tahun nie
jum2 kita study.

till then,
toodles

love;

ndia :)