Marah.

Tau tak betapa susah nya aku nak buat2 biasa, nak buat mcm aku okay je biar pon dalam hati dah sedalam laut aku menangis?

Tau tak betapa sedihnya aku nak tegur kau?

Tau tak betapa pedihnya tgk kau xberapa layan aku tp dgn org lain rilek je kau gurau?

Weyh aku dah cuba sedaya upaya aku nak buat normal, tp kau buat taik dgn aku. Aku tak tau apa masalah kau.

Aku yg nak cuba lupakan kau. Tp kau yg tak pasal2 taknak cakap dgn aku. Apa masalah kau?!

Nak je aku confront kau depan2 td. Tapi aku tak kisah. Kau xnak ckp xpayah ckp.

Aku bukannya tak biasa hilang kawan.

Kau boleh jadi another one of them.

Sb skrg aku marah, aku nak ckp kau boleh pergi mamp.

Sekian terima kasih.

Contemplate.

A few days back i have made a decision. I decided to reverse. I decided to stop having feelings (whatever it is) for that one particular people.

Why?

Because people were saying. Saying things. Saying things about them. And it kinda broke my heart.

You know the feeling when you want something but people say it is not available? Or it is too expensive? Or you are never gonna be good enough to get it? That was how i felt.

The funny part is i didnt do anything before giving up. I was like hoping for something but never really do anything about it. And suddenly i just gave up. And why did i give up? Because people were talking. And it was just some rumors. It was nothing really. But it was the final straw. I just couldnt take liking someone and do nothing about it.

And now it got me thinking. Should i give up? It was just talks. Nothing more than that. Why did i decide to take a step back and not forward? Was it just an excuse to let go? Does this mean i didnt like him enough to hold on? Or it just didnt worth the hurt?

But i never try. How could i know whats worth whats not?

Maybe to risk a friendship is just too big a deal for me. I couldnt stand not having a friend like that so i just gonna step back and be thankful that we are friends.

In the meantime,just give me some times to heal my heart my way.

I just love what we have to throw it away.

Love;
ndia.