the best of 2013

Hi. it's time for the year again. time to recollect our memories and write about it.
I have to be honest, i write this last minute and i don't really have any ideas so imma write spontaneously (like you could do that lol)

1- Holidays.
For the first time in my life, i traveled oversea with friends! that is exciting and i felt very matured. we went to hongkong and macau. i already wrote and post some pictures of the vacation, so no need to rewrite.
The end-of-term holidays were great because i fully maximize my holidays, unlike the midterm ones. i went all over places, eat and do things i wanna do and i dont really stay at home. i also revisited KMS and that's a point to remember.

2- Result.
My BDS first year result is sooo rewarding and made me, family and friends proud! i get invited to give talks, being interviewed for the school magazine and get to be onstage to get the awards. all the hardwork during the first year paid off and i enter the 2nd year with higher expectations from people :\

3- Scuba diving and snorkeling
I can finally tick off one of my to do list, scuba diving. it was a once-in-a-lifetime experience and i am so glad to do this. the feeling to be underwater is amazing yet scary. i constantly have to remind myself to breathe and calm down. colourful creatures of the sea can be seen but what attracted us most was the polka dot eel, lol. it was awesome really.






















4- Visit to Belgaum
First and maybe last time going to Belgaum to visit other half of md64. went to some river to do kayaking and swimming and picnic, and went to windmill site to take pictures. do a lot of catching up and went to eat the best apple pie in india. haha.

5- 21st Birthday
My first minute of becoming 21 was celebrated with watching movies with usrahmates- wahida and didi. then my friends came to wish birthday and eat cakes, and yani gave 'budak besar' to me. and that time you-know-how whatsapped to wish my birthday. the next day i went out celebrating with laundry usrah gang, dinie afiq and him. one of the few dates i had with him. and yeah he gave me a stress ball, the exact one i gave to dinie afiq on his birthday. irony isnt it? lol.

6- Raya haji and open houses.
Since we're now living in our own houses, in early days there were many open houses to attend. two of the biggest and most important open houses were the Raya Haji and BDS open house. held at husni's house. we get to get together, gotong royong and eat good food. how could i possibly forget this?

7- Puasa
First time to fast overseas. everyday we get to break our fast together in the hostel with free food, then perform the tarawih prayers. i had a tadarus group, where we recite the quran before maghrib and many times we cooked together and perform tarawih together. it was a memorable puasa. and luckily we had study leaves during fasting, so it wasnt really tiring. i cant remember how i studied in my room while fasting,but i survived! hooray!

8- BDS 4ever
My awesome batchmates! as we grew older, we get to know each other better and the ice is slowly broken. some of the events to remember was the trip to malpe beach to celebrate 2013 with malay batchmates, junior orientation where we perform dikir barat, open houses to malay and chinese houses and many more. may we become stronger together and all pass with flying colours.

writing this, i realized that it was a long year after all. many things happened, mostly good because i cant really recall bad memories (of course i can recall the ones that i fight with him, but nevermind that) and i am so blessed to be able to live this temporary yet mesmerizing life.

another year had passed and a new year is coming with a promise for a new beginning.

may the lessons learnt in this year make me grow stronger, and the memories created make me appreciate life better.

may 2014 brings more joy and tarbiyah to me. amiin.

goodbye 2013. hello 2014.

love;

nadia :)

Time

"Why did we become like this? Why are we so estranged now? Why aren't we like how we used to be?"

She thought to herself.

But then it hit her. Time.

Time. They say time heals broken hearts. Everything will go better with time. Just give some time.

But time also changes people.

And for a relationship that wasn't too strong, time can damage that too.

It was only last year, not last decade. Last year. Only a couple of months past and they act like the only thing in common between them is the classroom they shared.

Thinking back to the time of glory of their relationship, she missed it. So so much. The way they always talk to each other. The way they spent times together; morning, afternoon, evening, night. The way they chatted till the first ray of sunlight hit through their windows. She missed it all.

And she used to think that he liked her. He used to act as if he liked her. That he was willing to listen to all her ramblings. Throw her rubbish for her. Go out with her, for dinner, tea or lunch. Go out with her, because she wants to do some shopping. Chatted with her, because she doesn't feel like studying. And the way that he doesn't talk to other people in class. The way he always say hi to her first in the morning. Doesn't that mean he liked her? 

But time changes people.

Time changes him.

He doesn't text her first. He doesn't say hi to her first. In fact, they won't talk if it's not she had to tell something. No, he doesn't play around anymore. He is more serious. And less fun.

But maybe, just maybe, time changes her too?

Maybe she has no more story to tell him. Maybe she can throw her own rubbish. Maybe she always cook at home that there is just no reason to eat out. Maybe she has a new group of friends to go shopping with. Maybe, just maybe, she doesn't need him anymore.

And maybe, just maybe, time changes their feelings.

Or maybe, just maybe, she wished that she can stop the time where what matters is that they are together.

life update

hello blog.
dah berapa tahun tak update blog eh?
takpe. bukan ada orang baca pon HAHA
btw meh nak buat a lil life update.

eh actually takde lah lama sangat.
raya haritu dah update. hehe.

waktu cuti haritu pergi hk.
it was okay, nothing really amazing.
except the fireworks at disneyland.
that was AWESOME AND MAGICAL.
i hate the fact that everything was expensive.
siapa yang cakap pergi hk best shopping penipu besar! huh

now i'm back at manipal for my 2nd year, and hopefully final year here.
i had to give a lil speech to junior that day
kan dapat 4d. lol
i was a lil bit disappointed with myself because i didnt say all i wanna say
i guess i was nervous and i just want to get over with it.
and i ended up embarrassing myself.
nasib baik tak ramai datang haha.

i took part in the juniors orientation.
becoming a station master during the evening activity,
and performing dikir barat and flashmob during the dinner.
and yelling and laughing so loud that i lost my voice.
but it was good fun.

then the raya haji.
it was nice because we had two open house.
on the day itself, we had an open house for our classmates.
oh by we, i mean all the bds4 muslims.
my housemates and i masak roti jala.
we did that until 2 pagi.
nasib baik jadi and it was actually quite a hit. yeye
the 2nd open house we had few days after raya haji,
we cook nasi kerabu with daging bakar!
THAT WAS TOTALLY COMPLETELY A HIT!


















then did i tell you i'm now living in an apartment?
i have my own room again.
bayar mahal sket lah. and agak jauh.
but nevermind. ada hikmah dia tu
i'll show you the pictures.


living in your own house has its pros and cons.
the most important cons is you tend to get comfy and forgot that you're here to study,
that's what happened to me.
first block nie memang hancus.
tiap2 malam tengok movie. main2. tak study langsung
even nak test pon study bodoh2 je.
but on the bright side,i get to practice cooking.
and buying groceries,paying bills and all things grown ups do.
feel really matured.
feel like a 21 years old lady.
feel like a housewife. opps.





did i tell you i was thrown into batch b?
me and adl.
at first it was kinda suck because i'm used to being in batch a with all those people.
and because i got separated with that someone.
but later on i found out i rather be in batch b
than being in batch a and watch with envy.
i had MORE fun in batch b.
of course i got a little renggang with him,
tapi i dont think being in batch a will change anything.
people will still gossip him and her.
and gua makan hati.
so it is waaaayyy better to be in batch b and be ignorant of all that.
ignorance is bliss what.

so talking about the devil.
this year it was really awkward and weird and not at all like what we used to be
don't know what went wrong.
like he said, the chemistry wasn't there anymore,
i don't know what to talk about,
and he kept on keeping secrets.
not that i SHOULD know his secrets,
but i kinda terasa when he always says "ada hal"
like what hal sampai tak boleh cerita?
i did throw a small tantrum once.
and he did try to tell me what he 'hal'
but it didnt feel right you know?
like he's telling me not because he wanted to, but because he needed to.
so now i dont really tell him much
and he never tell me anything
anyway we dont spend much time together anymore.
we only have 1 hour theory class, and him coming late doesnt give us any time to catch up.

i remember we used to whatsapp all night long
and he once said, even if we are separated, 'whatsapp aku sentiasa terbuka utk kau'
kepala hotak dia. haha
even if i msg him, his replies wasnt earnest.
so i dont feel like talking to him.
so i didnt msg him.
and he never cares. wuwuwu sedih nya
HAHA

not being too close to him, i think i dont like him that much
i know i already said this,
but this time it's for real (kot)
because you see, i liked him because he was there for me.
now that he's not there anymore,why should i like him?
and he doesnt even like me in the first place HAHA

anyway, i read an article about ikhtilat.
and waktu tu pergh sentap habis!
because i was/still am like that
and that's why i tried to put some distance. like he didnt put already
i wanna be a good muslimah.

maybe actually this is all a sign that he wasnt THE one.
we're growing apart.
and we cant do nothing about that.
so let it be it.

by the way. apa panjang sangat cerita pasal mamat nie?
ish.
nak buat lil life update konon. cakap je lah nak berjiwang lol

oh nak cerita haritu pergi bangalore shopping.
habis duit.
so habis cerita. haha.

cuti feb nie papa and mommy datang.
i thought taknak balik lah kan.
dah bulan 8 nak balik for good (insyaAllah)
tapi sorang pon tak stay (not including the non-muslims and the boys)
so takkan aku nak melangu sorang2 10 hari lagi.
so aku bodek boss dan mungkin dah ada green light nak balik.
hik3.

anyway, i should be studying for the upcoming end block.
5 days more and i only baca 1 portion of microb.
3 subjek lagi ke laut ke?
taknak taknak. dr arun suruh dapat 4d lagi tahun nie
jum2 kita study.

till then,
toodles

love;

ndia :)

quick update.

assalamualaikum and hye bloggy.
its been sometime, right?
well there's so much to say.
like 1, i have finished my 1st year in BDS.
with flying colours. alhamdulillah :)
then 2, i'm back home for my 1 month holiday.
i arrived 2 days before raya. and raya was not a blast.
but nevermind. at least i'm home. hewhew.

there was so much to tell about the exams.
but now that i've pass it all, it didnt really matter.
so no story then haha.

about raya? nothing. really.
we dont really have an open house.
though some of my friends did came.
and the 3rd day we went to others open house.
the 4th and 5th day at terengganu for abe kay's wedding.
and thats my raya.

we went to sent adik to intec last week.
and on the way back we stopped at cameron highland.
its like a short vacation.

this coming wednesday i'll be going to kl with adani.
gonna do a pre-shopping before going to hk.
and visit kms.

oh this morning i cleaned the house.
felt really good after unleashing my inner neat freak lol.
and tomorrow imma clean my closet and my luggage.

and i still havent finish the book my akak usrah gave.
it was nice. but i have to focus to get what the author wanted to say.
so i keep on postponing that.
i'll read that after my kl trip, insyaAllah

so here's some pictures of my raya and short trip.

i think what made raya boring is because abang didnt come home. and because we are adults and we didnt get excited for raya anymore.

so thats all. talk to you later.

toodles/

love;

ndia :)

Finding love 2.

Since that day, Ashley was torn apart. Her plans were going well. Jake seems to be falling for her too. And she fell for Jake,she really do. But how can she love Jake if her heart was with Mike?

But Mike didnt know. He didnt even remember Ashley. And it hurts Ashley a lot, knowing the person who holds her heart thinks she is just another friends' friend. But what could a girl like Ashley do?

Days and nights Ashley spent thinking about a way to get Mike to remember her. Maybe,just maybe, if he remembers, and he feels the same way too, it will be clearer to Ashley.

She likes Jake,she really do. And she never want to hurt Jake's feelings, but now she was hurting. Confused. She was really at lost.

Then one day she thought of a way. She asked Mike out for a quick lunch, with the reasons of getting to know more about Jake from him. They ate,they talked. Yet Mike still show no signs of knowing Ashley before this. Then Ashley gave Mike a lollipop,one that he used to give her. Ashley searched his face for a flicker of recognization, but Mike just laughed and took the lollipop,not saying another word. Ashley gave the fakest smile ever, feeling her recently discovered heart breaking into pieces.

At home,Ashley wondered. How could Mike dont know her at all? Dont he ever think about her after kindergarten? Wasnt she special enough for him, the way he was to her? She knew it was stupid,it was 15 years ago. She dont really know what type of the person he has become. And he dont know her at all. But she hope he will. Maybe they can start again. Ashley and Jake are not exclusive yet,so why not?

But of course,fate meddles with you. A couple of days after the lunch, Jake asked Ashley out. On a saturday night. For a real date. It was romantic. They went to a restaurant near the beach, enjoying all the scrumptious seafoods. After that they went for a walk near the shore under the full moon. The sea breeze was gentle, and a gentleman Jake was, he offered her his jacket. Ashley could feel, with the pieces of her broken heart, that she was melting. And that was when Jake asked her to be his girlfriend. Ashley was stunned. That was all she has been wishing for since the first day she met Jake. But with Mike in the picture, she hesitated, only for a fraction of seconds.

Then she smiled sweetly at him, saying yes.
Maybe first love doesn't always worked out, she thought.

Tulistangan; Finding love

Love. What is love? Is liking the guy who gives you lollipops love? Or liking him because he plays with you in the kindergarten when no one else bothers? Or because of the facts that he has brown eyes and spiky hair? If that is love,then Ashley was in love.

And that was the only love,if it was love at all,that Ashley knew.

Mike had stolen her heart without knowing it. The way Mike looked at her,and smiled,and laughed,they all made Ashley's heart melt. She felt butterflies in her stomach,but she didnt know why. And when she told Mike about her stomach ache,Mike would laugh, dimples showing,eyes twinkling, and time would stopped.

After kindergarten,they went separate ways. And Ashley never hear from Mike again. And she never feel the butterflies. All she felt was the emptiness in her chest and she didnt know why.

Going through primary school,middle school,and high school was a breeze for Ashley. She was pretty,she scored well,she was not the mean girl. Guys fell at her feet,but she never really respond to any of them. She never really fall in love.

Her mom was worried that she wasnt pretty enough,wasnt popular enough that no boys were chasing her. But her dad was glad. He never want any immature irresponsible boys touching his little princess. But they didnt know,Ashley's heart was taken. Even Ashley didnt know that.

Sending Ashley to college with teary eyes,her mom told her something. Something like 'dont be afraid to fall in love. It happens'. But her dad said something else. Something wiser. He said 'your heart was taken. Find who took it'. Ashley smiled and hugged both of them.

Ashley settled in pretty quickly. She made friends like Jessica and Amanda. But they were not the reason why Ashley blushed. It was Jake. Jake the guy who accidentally bumped into Ashley,twice. Jake the guy with sparkling blue eyes,strawberry blonde hair and a crooked smile.
And Ashley smiled to herself thinking about that Jake.

Is this love? Ashley would wonder. And Ashley wondered what would Brenda the captain cheerleader do if she fall in love. Wear short skirts while cheering his name? Or what would June the smart Asian girl do? Maybe she will give him a really complicated equation explaining her feelings.
Then Ashley would laugh. But she realized,she was not Brenda or June,she has to do it her way.

And Ashley did it perfectly,the way she always do things.

First she started by becoming friends with Jake. It is the basic thing,of course she did that first. And it went well. With her sweetness and sense of humor,Jake became really comfortable with Ashley. They started studying together. Then they had lunches together. Next,they started hanging out during weekends. It went perfectly the way Ashley planned it to be.

Until one day when Jake introduce Ashley to his friend,Mike.
Suddenly Ashley felt happiness,beyond happiness,euphoria,contentment. Like finally her world makes sense.

Then Mike smiled,dimples showing, eyes twinkling.
And Ashley had found her heart back.

Marah.

Tau tak betapa susah nya aku nak buat2 biasa, nak buat mcm aku okay je biar pon dalam hati dah sedalam laut aku menangis?

Tau tak betapa sedihnya aku nak tegur kau?

Tau tak betapa pedihnya tgk kau xberapa layan aku tp dgn org lain rilek je kau gurau?

Weyh aku dah cuba sedaya upaya aku nak buat normal, tp kau buat taik dgn aku. Aku tak tau apa masalah kau.

Aku yg nak cuba lupakan kau. Tp kau yg tak pasal2 taknak cakap dgn aku. Apa masalah kau?!

Nak je aku confront kau depan2 td. Tapi aku tak kisah. Kau xnak ckp xpayah ckp.

Aku bukannya tak biasa hilang kawan.

Kau boleh jadi another one of them.

Sb skrg aku marah, aku nak ckp kau boleh pergi mamp.

Sekian terima kasih.

Contemplate.

A few days back i have made a decision. I decided to reverse. I decided to stop having feelings (whatever it is) for that one particular people.

Why?

Because people were saying. Saying things. Saying things about them. And it kinda broke my heart.

You know the feeling when you want something but people say it is not available? Or it is too expensive? Or you are never gonna be good enough to get it? That was how i felt.

The funny part is i didnt do anything before giving up. I was like hoping for something but never really do anything about it. And suddenly i just gave up. And why did i give up? Because people were talking. And it was just some rumors. It was nothing really. But it was the final straw. I just couldnt take liking someone and do nothing about it.

And now it got me thinking. Should i give up? It was just talks. Nothing more than that. Why did i decide to take a step back and not forward? Was it just an excuse to let go? Does this mean i didnt like him enough to hold on? Or it just didnt worth the hurt?

But i never try. How could i know whats worth whats not?

Maybe to risk a friendship is just too big a deal for me. I couldnt stand not having a friend like that so i just gonna step back and be thankful that we are friends.

In the meantime,just give me some times to heal my heart my way.

I just love what we have to throw it away.

Love;
ndia.

Malpe beach.

Its like our way of welcoming the new year.
We are actually celebrating our friends' birthday on december but accidently another friend's birthday is today. So a triple celebration it is.
We book a van for 6 am trip but after an hour waiting we decided to take the auto. The sun had already risen so we just sat and talked while waiting for the 2nd batch. And of course we took pictures. And ate some roti jala hehe.

So the 2nd batch arrived and after they took pictures we ate. Nasi with ayam masak merah and udang masak lemak. Kek batik (by me) and kek coklat. And we were so happy and sleepy. Some of them fell asleep.

Then i went parasailing. It was nice because you can fly. But it was all. And i was a little bit dissappointed.

Went back to the group and lied down. I hope people dont look bad at me because i lie down in between. I mean it wasnt really beside the boys but my head was next to theirs. And one of us took me photos. I just hope i look good in those. Haha

So we went home after that. I was so tired that my sleep was dreamless.

Enjoy some photos from me. Toodles :)